BIZARRE MILITARY MISHAPS:

1. Two U.S. Air Force F-15s shoot down two U.S. Army helicopters on a diplomatic mission over Iraq, mistaking them for hostile aircraft in the "no-fly zone, " killing 26 people. No one was found criminally responsible.

2. A "siesta" ordered by Mexican General Antonio Lopez de Santa Anna to his troops during a conflict between the Mexicans and Texans caused the infantry to be overtaken in just 18 minutes. Fort Douaumont at Verdun in France was captured in 1916 by a single German soldier after French General Chretien forgot to pass on orders to defend the fort to the last man to his successor.

3. The Russians tried to wreak havoc on German Panzer divisions during the WWII by strapping bombs to the backs of dogs and teaching them to associate food with the underneath of their enemies' tanks. Unfortunately, the dogs only associated food with their own tanks and forced an entire Soviet division to retreat.

4. Japanese soldier Hiroo Onodo refused to stop fighting long after WWII was over, claiming that stories of the war's ending were mere propaganda. It wasn't until his commanding officer flew out to the remote Pacific island where Onoda was holed up and ordered him to lay down his arms that he finally complied.

5. Probably the most famous mistake in U.S. military history occurred in the Civil War, when Confederate Gen. Stonewall Jackson was mistakenly shot by one of his own troops after the Confederate triumph at Chancellorsville.



WORLD WAR II BLUNDERS:

1. The first German serviceman killed in the war was killed by the Japanese (China, 1937), the first American serviceman killed was killed by the Russians (Finland 1940), the highest ranking American killed was Lt. Gen. Lesley McNair, killed by the US Army Air Corps. So much for allies.

2. The youngest US serviceman was 12 year old Calvin Graham, USN. He was wounded and given a Dishonorable Discharge for lying about his age. (His benefits were later restored by act of Congress)

3. At the time of Pearl Harbor the top US Navy command was Called CINCUS (pronounced "sink us"), the shoulder patch of the US Army's 45th. Infantry division was the Swastika, and Hitler's private train was named "Amerika". All three were soon changed for PR purposes.

4. More US servicemen died in the Air Corps than the Marine Corps. While completing the required 30 missions your chance of being killed was 71%.

5. Generally speaking there was no such thing as an average fighter pilot. You were either an ace or a target. For instance Japanese ace Hiroyoshi Nishizawa shot down over 80 planes. He died while a passenger on a cargo plane.

6. It was a common practice on fighter planes to load every 5th round with a tracer round to aid in aiming. This was a mistake. Tracers had different ballistics so (at long range) if your tracers were hitting the target 80% of your rounds were missing. Worse yet tracers instantly told your enemy he was under fire and from which direction. Worst of all was the practice of loading a string of tracers at the end of the belt to tell you that you were out of ammo. This was definitely not something you wanted to tell the enemy. Units that stopped using tracers saw their success rate nearly double and their loss rate go down.

YOU'VE GOT TO LOVE THIS ONE...

7. When allied armies reached the Rhine the first thing men did was pee in it. This was pretty universal from the lowest private to Winston Churchill (who made a big show of it) and Gen. Patton (who had himself photographed in the act).

8. German Me-264 bombers were capable of bombing New York City but it wasn't worth the effort.

9. German submarine U-120 was sunk by a malfunctioning toilet.

10. Among the first "Germans" captured at Normandy were several Koreans. They had been forced to fight for the Japanese Army until they were captured by the Russians and forced to fight for the Russian Army until they were captured by the Germans and forced to fight for the German Army until they were captured by the US Army.

AND WE SAVED THE BEST FOR LAST...

11. Following a massive naval bombardment 35, 000 US and Canadian troops stormed ashore at Kiska. 21 troops were killed in the firefight. It would have been worse if there had been any Japanese on the island.



RULES OF ENGAGEMENT:

01. YOU ARE NOT SUPERMAN.
02. RECOIL LESS RIFLES - AREN'T.
03. SUPPRESSIVE FIRE - WON'T.
04. IF IT'S STUPID, BUT WORKS, IT'S NOT STUPID.
05. DON'T LOOK CONSPICUOUS - IT DRAWS FIRE.
06. NEVER DRAW FIRE, IT IRRITATES EVERYONE AROUND YOU.
07. WHEN IN DOUBT, EMPTY THE MAGAZINE.
08. NEVER SHARE A FOXHOLE WITH ANYONE BRAVER THAN YOU.
09. YOUR WEAPON WAS MADE BY THE LOWEST BIDDER.
10. IF YOUR ATTACK IS GOING REALLY WELL, IT'S AN AMBUSH.
11. REMEMBER, IF THE CLAYMORE IS POINTED AT YOU.
12. ALL FIVE SECOND GRENADE FUSES ARE THREE SECONDS.
13. TRY TO LOOK UNIMPORTANT, THEY MAY BE LOW ON AMMO.
14. IF YOU ARE FORWARD OF YOUR POSITION, THE ARTILLERY WILL BE SHORT.
15. THE ENEMY DIVERSION YOU ARE IGNORING IS THE MAIN ATTACK.
16. THE EASY WAY IS ALWAYS MINED.
17. THE IMPORTANT THINGS ARE ALWAYS SIMPLE.
18. THE SIMPLE THINGS ARE ALWAYS HARD.
19. IF YOU ARE SHORT EVERYTHING, EXCEPT THE ENEMY, YOU ARE IN COMBAT.
20. NO ONE SURVIVES FIRST CONTACT INTACT.
21. WHEN YOU HAVE SECURED AN AREA, DON'T FORGET TO TELL THE ENEMY.
22. INCOMING FIRE HAS RIGHT OF WAY.
23. NO COMBAT READY UNIT HAS EVER PASSED INSPECTION.
24. NO INSPECTION READY UNIT HAS EVER PASSED COMBAT.
25. TEAMWORK IS ESSENTIAL. IT GIVES THEM MORE PEOPLE TO SHOOT AT.
26. IF THE ENEMY IS IN RANGE, SO ARE YOU.
27. FRIENDLY FIRE ISN'T.
28. ANYTHING YOU DO CAN GET YOU SHOT, INCLUDING DOING NOTHING.
29. MAKE IT TOO TOUGH FOR THE ENEMY TO GET IN, AND YOU CAN'T GET OUT.
30. TRACERS WORK BOTH WAYS.
31. THE ONLY THING MORE ACCURATE THAN INCOMING ENEMY FIRE IS FRIENDLY INCOMING FIRE.
32. RADIOS WILL FAIL AS SOON AS YOU NEED ANYTHING DESPERATELY.
33. IF YOU TAKE MORE THAN YOUR FAIR SHARE OF OBJECTIVES,

     YOU WILL HAVE MORE THAN YOUR FAIR SHARE TO TAKE.
34. WHEN BOTH SIDES ARE CONVINCED THEY ARE ABOUT TO LOSE-THEY'RE RIGHT.
35. PROFESSIONALS ARE PREDICTABLE-BUT THE WORLD IS MADE UP OF AMATEURS.
36. ALL WEATHER CLOSE AIR SUPPORT DOESN'T WORK IN BAD WEATHER.
37. THE BURSTING RADIUS OF A HAND GRENADE IS ALWAYS ONE FOOT GREATER THAN YOUR JUMPING RANGE.
38. THE ONLY TERRAIN THAT IS TRULY CONTROLLED IS THE TERRAIN YOU ARE STANDING ON.
39. MANED DESIGNATIONS NEVER SAY HOW MANY MEN.
40. THE LAW OF THE BAYONET SAYS: THE MAN WITH THE BULLET WINS.
41. IGNORE THE BODIES THAT ARE EVERYWHERE. JUST STEP OVER THEM..
42. THE BEST TANK KILLER IS ANOTHER TANK,

     THEREFORE TANKS ARE ALWAYS FIGHTING EACH OTHER AND HAVE NO TIME TO FIGHT THE WAR.
43. PRECISION BOMBING IS NORMALLY ACCURATE WITHIN THE PLUS OR MINUS ONE YOU ARE STANDING ON.
44. DON'T WORRY, GEORGE W. SENT YOU HERE, HE KNOWS WHAT IT IS LIKE TO BE IN A WAR..